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The Anthrax Story

Yes, the Anthrax Story, for your enjoyment. By Candace(AKA Emeraude), and Jaime(AKA Éowyn)
Can you tell who ended the story? hah. *cough*candace*cough*.

~*~*~*~* NightShroud’s Lair *~*~*~*~
NightShroud: *low voice* yes… I will infect the world with anthrax… mwa ha ha
Dark Jester: What are you saying sir?
NightShroud: Wah? Oh nothing, BRING ME MY TEA!
Dark Jester: Yes sir.
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile in a park somewhere *~*~*~*~
Emeraude: Are we lost again?
Éowyn: No… we just do not know where we are
Fizban: AHH the walls are closing in on me!
Phoenix: Walls? What walls? Have you been eating mushrooms again? *Smacks him in the head*
Fizban: Ouch did anyone get the license plate of that bus!
Phoenix: *smacks him again* I am not a bus!
Yazaki: Sir Fizban, how dare ye hit the lovely lady?
Emeraude: Eww gag me
Fizban: Lady? Where?
Emeraude: *smacks him over the head with a chair* that was rude
Fizban: Look at the birdies! *falls unconscious*
Éowyn: Great you knocked him out, you have to carry him
Emeraude: Dammit not again… *grabs fizban’s shoelace* let’s go
Heero: …yeah
Narr: Yay my turn! So they walk to meet up with the others… Finally they meet up with them… but egads! there are only 5 there
Emeraude: Hey guys where’s Ranma?
Phoenix: Yeah I had this bucket of water all ready for him
Tinwe: We lost him
ChibiTrunks: Actually he lost us
Lance: Cousin! *Runs up to Emeraude and hugs her*
Emeraude: Perfect *peels him off* go bug Éowyn
Éowyn: Go shove rocks up Fiz’s nose
Fizban: *wakes up* I heard that
Lantis: Right so anyway we gotta find him let’s split up. Groups of two we’ll meet back here in an hour
Emeraude: Dibs on Lantis! Or Heero! …No Lantis! No… Heero
Heero: Whatever
Emeraude: LANTIS!
Lantis: Okay Emeraude and I, Phoenix and Yazaki, Éowyn and Fizban, Julie and Heero, and ChibiTrunks and Lance. Pick a direction and go
Emeraude: North, North I want north
Julie: no I want north
Éowyn: no I do
Fizban: I do!
Narr: So after a considerable amount of arguing they came to the decision that ChibiTrunks and Lance would go north
Emeraude: Fine then I want south!
Éowyn: Fine south east for me
Phoenix: I’ll take south, southeast!
Emeraude: Okay let’s go!
Narr: And so they went… great where do I go?
Éowyn: You’re the Narr you can go everywhere
Narr: Oh right… I knew that. And so they all walked for hours even though they said they’d all be gone for an hour
Emeraude: This sucks *low voice* oh well, but I’m stuck with a cute guy
Lantis: Ranma where the hell are you!
Narr: Emeraude and Lantis walk over a mysteriously leafy area
Emeraude: Hey doesn’t this remind you of the movie where a person walked over a leafy area and fell though a hole with something pointy at the bottom?
Lantis: …No…
Emeraude: Uh oh *CRACK* IEEE Lantis… *SMACK* *CRUNCH* *from the hole* ow… I landed on a pointy rock
Lantis: ow… I think I hurt
Emeraude: I think I put a crack in my ass. Anything look odd to you?
Lantis: Uh… I don’t think that was there before.
Emeraude: Shut up *smacks him*
Lantis: Ow… let’s find a way outta here, oh look there’s a passage over there
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with Éowyn and Fizban *~*~*~*~
Éowyn: I’m bored, sore, tired, hungry and thirsty!
Fizban: Hey look, there’s mushrooms over there
Narr: Guys I don’t think that’s a good idea. Oh well nobody ever listens to me
Narr: They eat the mushrooms, which happen to be magic mushrooms
Éowyn: Dude you’re melting
Fizban: Hey you’re right! I am melting
Fizban: Hey look what I can do! *Stands on his head in the middle of a circle of rope*
Éowyn: *steps into a circle of rope*
Narr: *SNAP* Éowyn ends up hanging upside down from the tree while Fiz is hanging by his neck
Fizban: *choking noises*
Éowyn: AAH!
Narr: A trap door opens, they fall in but luckily Fizban breaks Eowyn’s fall
Éowyn: You’re soft!
Fizban: Ouch… my stomach…
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with Phoenix and Yazaki *~*~*~*~
Phoenix: Oh god would you please shut up!
Yazaki: I am deeply sorry my lady whatever can I do to make it up to you?
Phoenix: You can shut your pie hole!
Yazaki: As you wish my fair lady
Phoenix: Thank you jeesh…
Narr: As they walked they noticed a long wooden board
Phoenix: Let’s go jump on it
Yazaki: Your wish is my command
Narr: And they jump on the board, but all of a sudden *CRACK* and they fall through a large pit
Phoenix: Ow… my head!
Yazaki: Is there anything I can do?
Phoenix: yeah, shut up you’re making it worse
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with Julie and Heero *~*~*~*~
Julie: Ranma!
Heero: Ranma…
Julie: Ranma are you here?
Heero: Ranma…
Julie: God Dammit can’t you say more than one word?
Heero: Yeah…
Julie: Then why don’t you?
Heero: Cuz… *belches*
Julie: That’s not a reason!
Heero: …*belches again*
Julie: Gross… you pig
Heero: Oink *belches again*
Julie: Oh god what am I going to do with you
Heero: …*falls through a hole* *whomp* cool…
Julie: Oh well *shrugs and walks away and falls through a hole 3.529 feet away* Dammit I’m still stuck with him!
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with Tinwe *~*~*~*~
Tinwe: Dammit why do I have to go by myself? When Fiz the freak gets to go with Éowyn.
Tinwe: *grumbling falls through a hole and lands on Éowyn* *CRUNCH* uh oh…
Éowyn: you know that crunch? I think it was my ribs
Fizban: *starts giggling uncontrollably*
Éowyn: *gets up, throws a large stone at Fizban* guess they’re not broken after all.
Sore as hell though. Tinwe can you carry me?
Tinwe: Of course *picks her up and walk towards an opening* let’s go this way
Fizban: okay… dude I’m still melting
Tinwe: O…Kay what did you eat…
Éowyn: mushrooms!
Tinwe: I won’t ask why…
Éowyn: let’s just go
Fizban: Kay
Narr: they walk out of the room into a long tunnel, which looks like it goes on forever
Éowyn: Aww man and endless tunnel…
Fizban: How many stars do we need to make it end?
Éowyn: Shut up *kicks him in the head*
Fizban: Ow… let’s go *runs off*
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile in NightShroud’s Lair *~*~*~*~
NightShroud: What do we have here? Sorcerer M!
Sorcerer: Yes sir.
NightShroud: Many people have entered the lair, catch them
Sorcerer: as you wish
NightShroud: mwa ha ha… hmm maybe there’s a cute girl to torture in this group. And soon the world will be infected with anthrax. Mwa ha ha!
Dark Jester: Sir…
NightShroud: Wha… Oh…
Dark Jester: Sir you have to stop telling our plan someone will find out
NightShroud: How?
Dark Jester: I feel as if someone is watching us
NightShroud: Ha what a laugh. Be gone
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with Lantis and Emeraude *~*~*~*~
Emeraude: We’ve been walking for hours! My feet hurt!
Lantis: Actually it’s only been 15 minutes
Emeraude: Wha… Oh…
Lantis: Huh? Someone’s coming
Emeraude: eeek save me!
Sorcerer: You are to come with me
Emeraude: No way! Let’s get out of here
Narr: Lantis and Emeraude run with sorcerer whatever his name is on their backs
Lantis: Keep running
Emeraude: I’m trying! Huh… *CREAK* *SMASH* huh… someone’s soft…
Heero: Ow…
Emeraude: Heero! Julie! Lantis where are you?
Julie: Who’s that?
Emeraude: Dunno some freaky dude
Heero: *belches*
Julie: Not again! Help me!
Emeraude: … *walks and slips on some slimy stuff* ow… Eww get it off I’m covered in
slimy goop!
Julie: What is that stuff?
Emeraude: I don’t know but it’s sticky and slimy
Heero: Eww
Julie: Let’s go find the others
Heero: Whatever
Emeraude: Okay!
Narr: So they walk through a long tunnel
~*~*~*~* Fizban Éowyn and Tinwe *~*~*~*~
Fizban: the walls are melting! *Runs around laughing maniacally*
Éowyn: No the walls are crumbling!
Fizban: Melting!
Éowyn: Whatever
Tinwe: Let’s just keep going… *CREAK*
Éowyn: What’s that noise?
Sorcerer: Ha I got you now! Hey you’re not the people from before
Tinwe: You’re right… *CREAK* huh… *SMASH* ahh…
Éowyn: Eeek!
Fizban: Hey you guys are falling
Éowyn: Help me! *SMACK* oh someone…
Phoenix: Yeah you squashed him!
Yazaki: Ow thy fair lady is heavy…
Éowyn: How dare you! *Stands on Yazaki’s head* I’ll jump
Yazaki: No… please… I’m sorry thy fair lady
Phoenix: Just jump
Éowyn: Kay *jumps and lands on her butt on Yazaki’s back*
Yazaki: oh… *falls unconscious*
Éowyn: Shoot! *Grabs Yazaki’s hair* Let’s find the others
Phoenix: I thought Fiz the freak was with you
Éowyn: he’s up there *points up*
Phoenix: Oh well…
Narr: From a top Fiz was running around hysterically
Fizban: *Dances around singing* the walls are melting! *Looks down the hole* We’ll meet up later bye! *Runs off and falls down a hole just a few feet away* Hey something squishy… *Squishes it*
Emeraude: Hey Perv! *Throws Fiz into the wall*
Fizban: Ow *falls unconscious*
Julie: Look what you did
Emeraude: You’d do the same
Julie: Good point
Heero: Yeah *belches*
Emeraude: Stop that you pig…
Heero: Oink… *belches again*
Julie: Arrrg! Hiya! *Whacks Heero into the wall and he falls unconscious*
Emeraude: Wasn’t me *grabs Fiz’s shoelace* let’s go
Julie: Okay *grabs Heero’s pantleg*
Emeraude: Okay onward!
Narr: And so both groups of people look for each other while Lantis sits waiting
Narr: As Emeraude pulled Fiz - his shoelace broke and as Julie pulled Heero - his pants fell down
Emeraude: Eeek Julie!
Julie: Ahh! *Covers her eyes* tell me when his pants go back up
Emeraude: Whatever *attempts to fix Fiz’s shoelace*
Julie: Now?
Emeraude: Nope
Julie: Now
Emeraude: No…
Julie: Anything now?
Emeraude: No…
Julie: N…o…w…
Emeraude: No! They won’t go up on their own an I’m not touching him
Julie: Darn
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with Lantis *~*~*~*~
Lantis: Hey guys where are you? *CREAK*
Sorcerer: You’ll never find them Mwa ha ha
Lantis: Whatever, out of my way *walks past him*
Sorcerer: Get back here! *Goes in front of Lantis* You’re not going anywhere
Lantis: Whatever… *turns to walk away*
Sorcerer: Hold it! *Shoots tranquilizer into Lantis’ arm*
Lantis: Ow… *falls asleep*
Sorcerer: Now maybe I can get those cute girls to come. I’m sure they’ll want to save their friend. *Laughs evilly while dragging Lantis behind him*
Narr: Sorcerer whatever dragged Lantis all the way to where NightShroud was sitting
Sorcerer: Sir this was one of the people wandering through the lair tunnels
NightShroud: Very good, were there any girls?
Sorcerer: Yeah two cute ones
NightShroud: Excellent *does the Mr.Burns finger thing*
Dark Jester: I think that’s some serious copyright infringement
NightShroud: I don’t care, be gone!
Dark Jester: Yes sir
NightShroud: No wait
Dark Jester: What?
NightShroud: The girls capture the girls!
Dark Jester: Okay *he runs off*
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with ChibiTrunks and Lance *~*~*~*~
ChibiTrunks: Ranma? Ranma!
Lance: Where are you Ranma? ANYBODY!
ChibiTrunks: Where are they it’s been 2 ½ hours!
Lance: I Dunno I keep hearing funny creaks and screams. *CRACK* uh oh *CRUNCH*
Dark Jester: Ouch…
Lance: *gets up* who the fork are you?
Dark Jester: Fork? I’m Dark Jester
ChibiTrunks: Where are we?
Dark Jester: You are in the great NightShroud’s lair!
Lance: Who’s that?
Dark Jester: Grr Just come with me intruders
ChibiTrunks: And if we don’t want to?
Dark Jester: You people always have to make this hard… *whips out a frying pan and knocks them both out, then drags them back to NightShroud by their shoes*
NightShroud: These aren’t girls!
Dark Jester: It’s not my fault they fell on me!
NightShroud: Oh well put them in the cage with that weird dude and go back for the girls
Dark Jester: Yes sir
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with Emeraude, Julie, Fiz and Heero *~*~*~*~
Fizban: *wakes up* You broke my shoelace! *Picks up the piece and whips Emeraude with it*
Emeraude: *pulls out an actual whip* you’re asking for it buddy
Fizban: *eats shoelace* I didn’t do anything!
Emeraude: *puts her whip away* and you’d better not do anything
Fizban: yes ma’am
Julie: Man this tunnel seems to go on for AHH! *WHUMP* ow… I’m okay
Emeraude: *looks down the hole* YOU SURE YOU’RE OKAY?
Narr: Just then Phoenix falls from the floor above Emeraude, through the hole and lands on Julie
Julie: *CRACK* ow… I’m not okay anymore
Éowyn: *looks down the hole* Hey Emeraude! Wassup?
Emeraude: *looks up* Hiya!
Éowyn: *looks over at Heero* Emeraude what were you doing with him?
Emeraude: It wasn’t me! Julie pulled his pants down
Julie: *from in the hole* BY ACCIDENT!
Éowyn: Sure. Fiz you mind pulling his pants up?
Fizban: Yes, but I’ll do it anyway *pulls Heero’s pants up*
Éowyn: Oh yeah, and when he wakes up tell him he has nice tropical fish pattern tighty-whities for me.
Emeraude: Sure *throws Fiz up the hole* and take him for me
Fizban: *goes up through the hole and hits the ceiling* ow…
Éowyn: I don’t want him! Well… actually take this guy instead! *Throws Yazaki down the hole*
Yazaki: Thy fair lady catch me!
Emeraude: Not even *steps aside and Yazaki hits the ground*
Yazaki: Ye ouch…
Emeraude: oops sorry *mutters* not
Yazaki: It is all right thy fair lady
Emeraude: Whatever
Éowyn: Hey Emeraude! Let’s try to meet up. We’ll both go that way *points left* and eventually we’ll meet up
Emeraude: Kay! Let’s go!
Éowyn: Bye
Emeraude: Yeah, hey Julie once we meet up we’ll come back for you
Julie: O…Kay
Narr: So they part ways hoping to meet on the same level
Phoenix: They will come back right? *JINGLE*
Julie: What’s that?
Dark Jester: You shall come with me… NightShroud wishes to see you
Julie: Eeek no never help me!
Dark Jester: Resistance is futile! *Grabs both girls and drags them off* ow *gets kicked by Phoenix* ow *gets kicked again*
Narr: As Dark Jester dragged the girls to the lair he kept getting kicked in the face
Dark Jester: Ow *drops the two girls* here are the girls
NightShroud: Excellent
Sorcerer: Umm sure these girls are cute, but they’re the wrong girls
NightShroud: What!
Sorcerer: They are different girls, the girls I saw were much cuter
NightShroud: Okay Sorcerer, you go find these girls
Sorcerer: Yes sir
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with Emeraude, Heero and Yazaki *~*~*~*~
Emeraude: Shut up Yazaki!
Yazaki: Of course thy fair maiden
Emeraude: Whatever
Heero: *wakes up* umm…
Emeraude: Oh good you’re up I have a message from Éowyn for you
Heero: What?
Emeraude: She says you have nice tropical fish pattern tighty-whities
Heero: Umm… *blushes*
Emeraude: Don’t blame me, Julie pulled your pants down by “accident”

Heero: Right
Yazaki: Thy fair lady does not have a care for your tighty-whities
Emeraude: *smacks Yazaki* shut up they were nice! *CREAK*
Heero: Whatever *belches*
Sorcerer: AH ha I have found one of the girls. NightShroud will be pleased since you are so cute
Emeraude: Really? *Poses* I know I’m beautiful and all but I didn’t know I was that beautiful
Sorcerer: *grabs her arm* Let’s go
Emeraude: Okay take me away
Sorcerer: Wha…
Emeraude: Anything to get away from Yazaki
Sorcerer: Hmm okay let’s go… *pulls her out of sight*
Yazaki: Thy fair lady!
Heero: Emeraude…
Narr: So sorcerer blah blah took Emeraude to the lair of NightShroud
Emeraude: Yo Julie!
Julie: Emeraude what are you doing here?
Emeraude: Yazaki.
NightShroud: Who are you?
Emeraude: I’m Emeraude *smiles a flirtatious smile* you?
NightShroud: I’m speechless… I mean NightShroud
Julie: Blech *makes gagging noises*
Emeraude: I see if you excuse me *smiles and steps into the cage* I’m a prisoner now
Sorcerer: She wanted to get away from a guy, I don’t know why though
NightShroud: Yo Emeraude come have tea with me
Emeraude: Sure *winks at Julie*
Narr: And so Emeraude and NightShroud go off to have some tea together
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with Eowyn’s group *~*~*~*~
Fizban: Look at me I’m a surfer chic
Tinwe: Are you sure chic?
Fizban: Yup… Woah cool you look funny. Your face is melting and your body is growing
Tinwe: Right
Éowyn: Hey look light!
Fizban: *makes an echo* the light, come to the light
Éowyn: Umm… right
Tinwe: Let’s keep going I think I hear something
Heero: *belches*
Tinwe: It sounds like a belch
Éowyn: let’s follow!
Narr: Éowyn, Tinwe and Fiz all run towards the sound and they see Heero with Yazaki
Éowyn: Where’s Emeraude *Puts a finger out to Yazaki* don’t you say a word
Heero: Captured…
Éowyn: By whom?
Heero: Dude…
Éowyn: What kind of dude?
Heero: Creak…
Éowyn: Never mind let’s just look
Tinwe: Okay let’s go!
Narr: They all run looking and eventually they hear a *CREAK*
Heero: dude…
Éowyn: Come out!
Sorcerer: Gladly *takes her arm* let’s go!
Éowyn: *bites him* tastes like chicken, but needs salt.
Sorcerer: Ow! *Looks at the bite marks* you vampire... I’ll have to take you out another way
Éowyn: *sticks her tongue out* ha you can’t catch me! Neener Neener Neener!
Narr: After about two hours of chasing her he finally caught her
Sorcerer: Now I got you… ow *gets punched by Éowyn* NightShroud will Ow *punched again* be pleased Ow! *Again*
Narr: And so sorcerer took Éowyn to NightShroud’s lair while getting punched the whole way
Éowyn: Ha… Huh… Where am I?
Emeraude: Yo Éowyn! Wanna join NightShroud and me for tea?
Éowyn: Sure *drops Sorcerer’s hair*
Emeraude: You pulled his hair?

Éowyn: Yup… What kind of tea?
Emeraude: Herbal!
Éowyn: Kahkooi! *Jumps on the table* hey what’s this white powder
NightShroud: Umm… don’t touch that
Emeraude: I think baking powder or flour, he must want to do an anthrax scare
Éowyn: Cool I’m taking some *stuffs white powder into her pocket*
Emeraude: Are you sure that was a good idea?
Éowyn: It’s fine!
NightShroud: Umm… Right… well let’s have tea!
Éowyn: Okay!
Narr: As they sat down for tea Éowyn went to sit down, but missed the chair
Éowyn: Ow… that hurt…
Emeraude: Uh.. Right how could you miss that chair?
Éowyn: I didn’t know which one there were five of them
Emeraude: There’s only one
Éowyn: Whoa cool! The walls are melting and the room is spinning. Hey Emeraude you’re purple and odd looking and.. Speckled.. cool!
Emeraude: Right…. What did you eat?
Éowyn: Dunno *spins around and falls on the floor* oomph... *passes out*
Emeraude: I didn’t do it; I’m not dragging her
NightShroud: *watches Éowyn twitch on the ground* is she going to be all right?
Emeraude: Meh she always is. Well now that she’s gone, let’s have a quiet romantic dinner
NightShroud: Uh okay DARK JESTER!
Dark Jester: *Jingle* yes boss?
NightShroud: Go put her on one of the guest beds *points at Éowyn*
Dark Jester: Yes sir *picks her up and carries her away* *Jingle*
Emeraude: So.. What was that stuff she put in her pocket anyway *starts stuffing her face*
NightShroud: …. Anthrax..
Emeraude: *starts choking* Anthrax? *Cough*
NightShroud: yeah I tried to warn her
Emeraude: What are you planning on doing with Anthrax?
NightShroud: Well I was planning on infecting the world mwahahaha!
Emeraude: Cool can I help?
NightShroud: Okay I guess
Emeraude: Yay!! *Goes back to stuffing her face*
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with Fiz’s Group *~*~*~*~
Tinwe: Can somebody explain to me again why we didn’t go after them?
Fizban: Nobody suggested it at the time… HUZZAH!! *Tackles Yazaki*
Yazaki: what the - I mean thou has tackled me. Be off with you, you swine!
Heero: Riiight….
Tinwe: Well maybe now would be a good time to go after them
Heero: Whatever *CREAK*
Sorcerer: Mwahahaha you will not have to look very long. Come with me.
Tinwe: All right
Narr: And so they follow Sorcerer Whatever his name is… but wait, Fizban is missing
Tinwe: hey dude, where’s Fiz the freak?
Heero: Dunno *shrugs*
Fizban: HUZZAH!! *Drops from the ceiling and tackles Tinwe*
Tinwe: AHH!! *Picks up a cardboard box and whacks Fizban repeatedly with it*
Fizban: I’ll have a fear of boxes forever.. *Falls to the ground*
Tinwe: AHA! I got him! *Grabs Fizban’s ear and drags him by it*
Narr: And so they finally make it to NightShroud
Sorcerer: *knocks on NightShroud’s door* Sir? I have some good news
NightShroud: NOT NOW! - BUSY
Sorcerer: Uh... Doing what? Err - never mind, I don’t want to know
Emeraude: Go away!
Sorcerer: *sweat drop* …*walks away* Um, NightShroud is busy; he’ll deal with you guys later. Into the cage!
Julie: Oh no it’s Heero, not again
Phoenix: Yazaki… not Yazaki…
Yazaki: Thy fair ladies!
Phoenix: No! *Curls up in a corner of the cage* Stay Away!
Tinwe: Where’s Éowyn? Where’s Emeraude?
ChibiTrunks: Éowyn is somewhere passed out and Emeraude’s “Having Tea”
Tinwe: Having tea?
ChibiTrunks: no, no, no “Having Tea!”
Tinwe: Oh… Oh… Nasty
Everyone: Gross
Heero: Cool
Fizban: *pulls Heero’s pants down*
Heero: Hey!
Phoenix: Nice gitch!
Heero: Um… *blushes* *pulls his pants back up*
Yazaki: How long has my love been in there for?
Julie: Oh about 2 hours
Lance: Eww
Yazaki: How vile thy torture to my love!
Fizban: Shut-up
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with Éowyn *~*~*~*~
Éowyn: *wakes up* oww my head
Dark Jester: How are you feeling?
Éowyn: Good thank you Mr. Purple elephant
Dark Jester: Um, I’m not a purple elephant
Éowyn: Oh sorry, my mistake. Sorry Mr. Green elephant
Dark Jester: oh god what are you on?
Éowyn: shrooms and this stuff *pulls some white stuff out of her pocket and throws it*
Dark Jester: Ah! *Grabs her and pulls her out of the room then proceeds to board the door shut*
Éowyn: hehe... funny little clown man *falling over*
Dark Jester: That’s it! *Takes her by the hand and throws her in the cage with the others*
Fizban: *catches Éowyn* oomph. Watch where you’re throwing things! *Goes to eat Éowyn but then realizes who she is* oh, hi Éowyn.
Éowyn: …Hiya…
Fizban: *throws Éowyn at Tinwe* Hold this for me
Tinwe: *catches her* for you?
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with Emeraude and NightShroud *~*~*~*~
Emeraude: So that’s the plan?
NightShroud: Yeah…
Emeraude: That’s it?
NightShroud: Uh…yeah
Emeraude: well how ‘bout we break into the chip factory and dump Anthrax into the chips?
NightShroud: What a brilliant idea! I’m glad I thought of it
Emeraude: *whacks him with a plate of brussel sprouts* hey genius it was my idea
NightShroud: right *spits brussel sprouts out*
Emeraude: Good, I’m glad you see it my way…
NightShroud: damn, whipped…
Emeraude: Let’s go check on the prisoners! Huzzah! Onward!
Fizban: that’s my word
Emeraude: it’s mine now mwahahaha!
Fizban: That reminds me… HUZZAH! *Tackles ChibiTrunks*
ChibiTrunks: *falls backwards onto Phoenix* Ow… squishy…
Phoenix: Don’t even think of it…
ChibiTrunks: Oh sorry…
Fizban: HUZZAH! *Tackles the cage door and falls unconscious* *CREAK*
Sorcerer: oops I forgot to lock the door *locks it*
Emeraude: Incompetence! No slave of mine shall forget! You’re fired! In the cage!
Sorcerer: But NightShroud is my master
NightShroud: If she says you’re fired then YOU’RE FIRED!!!
Sorcerer: but… but… *gets in the cage and locks it behind him and throws Dark Jester the key*
NightShroud: hey what’s Éowyn doing in the cage?
Dark Jester: Something about elephants…
Emeraude: let her out now!
Tinwe: But she’s sleeping…
Emeraude: *takes the key from Dark jester and opens the cage* Yo Éowyn! Wake up!
Éowyn: five more minutes mommy *uses Tinwe’s shoulder as a pillow*
Julie: Aww what a cute couple
Emeraude: Now! *Grabs her arm*
Tinwe: You can’t have her
Fizban: Yeah she’s mine! HUZZAH! *Tackles Emeraude*
Emeraude: *pulls Éowyn with her who pulls Tinwe and they all trip over Phoenix* Ow…
Fizban you jerk! I need an aspirin…
Fizban: I need many aspirins… two bottles if you have…
NightShroud: *pulls Emeraude out of the cage*
Fizban: HUZZAH! *Runs to tackle the cage door, but it closes in his face* *WHACK* Ow
Emeraude: umm bye *gets pulled out of the room*
Éowyn: *still sleeping*
Emeraude: *whines* my head hurts
NightShroud: HUZZAH, I mean here… *passes her some aspirin*
Emeraude: Thank you Mr. Fluorescent pink monkey *falls unconscious on his bed*
NightShroud: Hmmm… no… I won’t *smacks himself* how could you think that!
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile in the cage *~*~*~*~
Fizban: HUZZAH! *Tackles Phoenix who hits her head on the cage*
Phoenix: Ow… jerk *falls unconscious*
ChibiTrunks: Phoenix! Wake-up Phoenix
Lance: Phoenix! Fiz who the fork do you think you are?
Fizban: I am the great Noonsa! King of the fish!
Lance: Uh… Yeah…
Heero: Umm…
ChibiTrunks: That’s odd…
Heero: Weird…
Tinwe: you’re a strange man Fiz the freak
Fizban: I am Noonsa! Lord and master of fish!
Tinwe: What happened to king of the fish?
Fizban: Wha… I’m Noonsa, Lord and master not king!
ChibiTrunks: Whatever… looser…
Tinwe: Shut-up and sleep *grabs Fiz and throws him headfirst into the cage*
Fizban: Noonsa… I’m Noonsa *falls unconscious*
ChibiTrunks: Glad that’s over… Hey Phoenix wake-up *leans over her*
Phoenix: *wakes up and sees ChibiTrunks in her face* AHH! *Whacks him in the face*
ChibiTrunks: Ah! My nose! You broke my nose!
Phoenix: Oh sorry I thought you were Yazaki or Fizban…
ChibiTrunks: It’s okay…
Yazaki: Where did thy ladylove go?
Phoenix: who knows with her *picks up a trash can lid* go to sleep *hits Yazaki in the head with the lid*
Yazaki: Ow thy head hurts… *falls unconscious*
ChibiTrunks: That did it
Lance: Hole yeah!
Éowyn: *wakes up* *yawns* good morning everybody! *Looks down at Fiz and Yazaki* Um… Okay…
Julie: *crouching in the corner* Make him go away… *covering her ears and bouncing forward* make him go away…
Heero: Riiight…
Julie: NOOOO! *Whacks Heero over the head with a table*
Heero: Owch… *falls to the ground*
ChibiTrunks: I’m bored *takes off his shoe* hmmmm… *grins evilly at Tinwe*
Tinwe: Dude why are you looking at me like that? You’re scaring me…
ChibiTrunks: YEEHAW! *Throws his show at Tinwe’s head, knocking him out cold*
Tinwe: *falls to the ground*
ChibiTrunks: HAHA YEEHAW! *Throws his other shoe at Julie*
Julie: Damn… *falls down* *thud*
ChibiTrunks: hehe *goes to take off his other shoe but finds that they’re both already off* aw man… *Takes off his sock*
Phoenix: No… Don’t do it…
ChibiTrunks: AHAHA! YEEHAW! *Strangles Phoenix and Éowyn with his sock until they pass out* *then proceeds to do the same to everyone* *then rams the door of the cage and knocks himself out*
Dark jester: *walks in the room* what the - NightShroud!!
NightShroud: *comes running* what… *Gasp* happened… *breathing heavy*
Dark Jester: How many times have I told you to get regular exercise?
NightShroud: What… happened?
Dark Jester: I don’t know
NightShroud: Jeesh, these kids are weird
Emeraude: They’re crazy it’s that simple. I know them, but if this happened it must have been because of Éowyn or Fizban… they’re crazy insane gopher people…
NightShroud: Oh okay
Dark jester: Huh I don’t get it…
Emeraude: *whacks Dark Jester with a hardcover book* IDIOT!
Dark Jester: Ow… *Jingle* *falls to the ground*
NightShroud: Serves him right!
Emeraude: Correct! Now I’m hungry…
NightShroud: Again?
Emeraude: Let’s discuss world domination over a snack
NightShroud: Of course!
Emeraude: *takes out her chocolate bar* yummy… *looks over at NightShroud* bite? *Holds it out*
NightShroud: Thanks *takes a big bite*
Emeraude: Hey that was half my chocolate bar! *Picks up a desk and throws it at his head*
NightShroud: Ow… *falls unconscious*
Emeraude: opps… sorry… aw gee I have no one to talk to… everyone’s unconscious… DRAT! Narr: you can talk with me…
Emeraude: NO! *Throws a cement block on the Narr*
Narr: Oomph Ow…*falls unconscious*
Emeraude: Humph… Stupid Narr! Don’t wanna talk with him… *walks off grumbling to herself*
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with Ranma *~*~*~*~
Ranma: Hey dude where is everyone
Narr2903: They’re away
Ranma: Uh, where is Narr?
Narr2903: He’s unconscious
Ranma: Oh where are the others?
Narr2903: Well Uh… They’re…
Ranma: Tell me damnit! *Picks up a tree and whacks Narr2903 in the head*
Narr2903: Mommy can you get the license plate number of the train that hit me… *falls unconscious*
Ranma: Shimmatta! *Punches a tree* ow… ow… *runs around and into a tree* Shimmatta… *falls unconscious*
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with Emeraude *~*~*~*~
Emeraude: Gosh darn it… *walks into the room* everyone’s still out here but… how…
ChibiTrunks: *wakes up* Hey Emeraude come here! *Grins*
Emeraude: Sure *walks up to the cage* what?
ChibiTrunks: YEEHAW! *Takes off his sock and strangles her, then he runs into the cage and knocks himself out again*
~*~*~*~* 6 Hours Later *~*~*~*~
Éowyn: Ow my neck…
ChibiTrunks: That was cool…
Éowyn: you stupid bum *kicks him*
ChibiTrunks: Ow… *takes out his shoe*
Éowyn: I don’t think so *takes one of ChibiTrunks’ socks and ties him up*
ChibiTrunks: *laughs insanely* they’re going to get you! The fish will get you! Mwahahaha!
Éowyn: Right…
Heero: *wakes up* Emeraude?
Éowyn: Don’t know where she is
Tinwe: *gets up* Éowyn my love are you okay?
Éowyn: Tinwe I’m fine just please don’t act like Yazaki
Tinwe: Sure no problem
Éowyn: Great *hugs Tinwe* you’re the best!
Tinwe: yeah I am
ChibiTrunks: Whatever… *laughs insanely* the fish remember what I said about the fish!
Éowyn: shut-up *stuffs a sock in his mouth*
Tinwe: That’s the way to go
Éowyn: Thanks
Heero: Ha
Julie: *wakes up* Ow… oh now… not him! *Goes into a corner* make him go away!
Éowyn: How?
Julie: I don’t know just make him go away!
Éowyn: Okay… Whatever
Heero: Right…
Julie: AHHH!! *Runs around the cage screaming*
Sorcerer: Man… What a wake-up call… can you be quiet please?
Éowyn: Don’t mind her or ChibiTrunks…
Sorcerer: Okay…
~*~*~*~* In a room with Emeraude *~*~*~*~
Emeraude: *gets up* man that was nuts… hey how’d I get in here?
Narr83: You’re in the Narrator’s Exchange Building… You’re under arrest for brutal beating of a Narr!
Narr29: Yeah you’re in trouble
Narr809: You have the right to remain silent
Emeraude: So many Narrs… so many… a sea of Narrs… oh man… too many Narrs
Narr3092: Are you okay?
Emeraude: So many…
Narr20: Hey cutie… we’ll let you go if you go on a date with one of us
All Narrs: YEAH!
Emeraude: *stares out into the sea of Narrs* oh man… so many Narrs *starts shaking*
Narr206: Umm… What’s up?
Emeraude: ………………………
Narr320: Are you sure you’re okay?
Emeraude: …… Umm ……… So……… many ………
All Narrs: Answer me!
Emeraude: *gulp* ……………………
All Narrs: Are you okay?
Emeraude: *screams and starts running around madly* AHHH! You all look the same!
Narr76: Yes we’re all clones
Emeraude: AHHH! FREAKY! HUZZAH!
~*~*~*~* Back at NightShroud’s Lair *~*~*~*
NightShroud: *wakes up* huh? Hey where’s Emeraude? She’s gone damnit! *Gets up and walks over to the cage*
Éowyn: Hey look, it’s NightShroud! Everyone’s favorite Molten Badger
NightShroud: Umm
Fizban: Hey that’s my insult! You stole it you gopher lady!
Éowyn: What is it with you and gophers?
Fizban: They taste good
NightShroud: Um, am I missing something here? WHERE IS EMERAUDE YOU FREAKISH CHILDERN!!
Lance: The Narrs took her
Fizban: *laughs* they most likely took her to sacrifice her for a Narr sacrificing ceremony
NightShroud: Oh dear lord… DARK JESTER!!
Dark Jester: *jingle* yes sir
Éowyn: We’ll help too
NightShroud: Sure
Sorcerer: Huzzah! Let’s go!
Fizban: My word damnit *spits on sorcerer*
Sorcerer: Eww gross… *wipes the spit off*
Éowyn: Haha!
Fizban: well let’s go
Julie: Open the cage *looks over at Heero* I’m asking you nicely to open the cage
Heero: *belches*
Julie: *grabs the cage* open it! Open it! Open the cage!
Heero: What?
Julie: AHHH! *Rams into the cage* open it!
NightShroud: Maybe she should stay behind
Éowyn: Whatever
NightShroud: *opens the cage* Okay, you and you and you and you can come *points to Éowyn, Lance, Fizban and Tinwe* oh and Sorcerer as well as you and you *grabs Heero, Sorcerer, and ChibiTrunks* the rest stay here
Julie: Fieuf, relief
Fizban: Booga Boo! *Runs to the cage*
Julie: AHH! *Crawls into a corner* go away… please… someone kill me
NightShroud: I umm have Anthrax in the back
Julie: No thanks; I wanna die a slow painful death
NightShroud: oh okay *walks off* let’s go!
Éowyn: Dude we have no Narr, he’s gone to wherever Emeraude is… oops
Tinwe: I’ll be the Narr!
Éowyn: Cool!! Okay Narr do your stuff
Tinwe: And so they all split up in different directions
Éowyn: Hey you’re supposed to say what streets we take
Tinwe: Oh sorry… Éowyn and Sorcerer go down Washna street, Heero and ChibiTrunks go down Poronga Avenue, Lance and Fizban cover Arkanse Blvd, and I follow them how’s that!
Éowyn: Cool let’s go!
Tinwe: Everyone agrees, oh I forgot NightShroud and Dark Jester go down Malyaria Avenue… So they all go in their direction looking for Emeraude
~*~*~*~* Meanwhile with lance and Fizban *~*~*~*~
Lance: So where do you suppose this Narrator building is?
Fizban: Up my nose?
Lance: Um no I don’t think so
Tinwe: *runs up* Damn those narrators must be in shape
Lance: What are you doing here?
Tinwe: I’m the new Narr
Lance: You’re not a Narr
Tinwe: Yeah I am
Fizban: Then where’s the building?
Tinwe: On the corner of Wertyu and Poiuy
Lance: Why didn’t you say that before?
Tinwe: I didn’t think of it
Lance: *falls over anime style*
Tinwe: Come on I’ll show you. This way!
Tinwe: So they - err - we walked down this street… whatsitcalled street… Name that I can’t remember which just happened to run into Wertyu Street. So they took Wertyu up to Poiuy.
Fizban: HUZZAH! *Tackles Lance*
Lance: *hits his head on a pole* mummy *falls unconscious*
Fizban: Damnit *drags Lance by his ankles*
Tinwe: We walk around the corner and everyone’s already there
Éowyn: What took you guys so long?
Tinwe: That doesn’t make sense we were the only ones who knew our way here!
Éowyn: Don’t have to make sense *shrugs*
NightShroud: So where do we go from here
Heero: *snickers* building
Éowyn: Yeah the one that says Narrators Exchange in big letters, why you so desperate to find her anyway?
NightShroud: Umm no reason let’s go
Tinwe: So they go inside, hey Narr 13908.34
Narr13908.34: Yo Tinwe aka Narr 765329087
Éowyn: My god you’re a Narr!
Narr80597: Hey Éowyn aka Narr 6894387243
Emeraude: Damn those are big numbers
NightShroud: Emeraude my love… I mean Emeraude…
Éowyn: Did you just call her your love?
NightShroud: …… No ……
ChibiTrunks: hmmmmph… hmph…
Fizban: HUZZAH! *Swings Lance around*
Éowyn: Watch where you’re swinging that thing… you con takes somebody’s eye out with that…
Fizban: So? *Whacks Dark Jester with him*
Dark Jester: ow… ow… ow… *jingle* ow… *falls down*
Emeraude: That’s mean *grabs Lance from him* hehe *swings Lance into Narr 989031767382468*
Narr989031767382468: Owch… *falls down*
Tinwe: We better get outta here!
Narr: They all start to run but NightShroud falls because Éowyn stepped on his shoelace and is mauled by a vicious group of Narrators!
NightShroud: Crap…
Narr487: Narr3076 rips NightShroud’s shirt off and Narr392 whacks him in the head with a baseball bat while Narr1842 steps on his neck while Narr43 pokes him in the eye
NightShroud: Damnit my eye!
Narr387: Finally he gets thrown out of the crowd all beaten up
Éowyn: *laughs*
Narr5829: Emeraude! That’s what you get for not going out with us! We beat up your boyfriend!
Emeraude: Boyfriend? Where, where?
Fizban: But I’m your boyfriend
Emeraude: No you’re not… I don’t have one
Éowyn: What was that about?
Emeraude: Dunno, somethin’ about a date with them
Éowyn: Oh… Okay
Fizban: *stands on his head* look what I can do
Emeraude: Wanna see what I can do?
Éowyn: No *grabs Fiz and throws him into a brick wall*
ChibiTrunks: hmph… hmph… hmph… hmph…
Sorcerer: *Creak* take that sock outta his mouth
Éowyn: Sure *takes the sock out of ChibiTrunks’ mouth*
ChibiTrunks: great thanks
Fizban: Are you sure I’m not your boyfriend?
Emeraude: You are not my boyfriend! You’re worse than Whoolio!
Éowyn: Who’s Whoolio?
Emeraude: Never mind I don’t want to go there
Éowyn: ‘Kay let’s go back *steps on NightShroud’s hand* but we won’t be going in the cage!
NightShroud: Okay… OW
Éowyn: Good
Emeraude: You know it was Dark jester who threw you in the cage
Éowyn: What!
Dark Jester: Uh Oh… *runs*
Éowyn: Come back here! *Chases after Dark Jester*
Emeraude: Let’s hurry before we lose them… and I’m not carrying you… Sorry NightShroud
ChibiTrunks: I got him *takes NightShroud by the hair* let’s go
NightShroud: Ow… not the hair! Ow!
Narr: And so they all ran after each other and they got back to NightShroud’s lair
Emeraude: I’ll have a fear of Narrs for the rest of my life
Éowyn: Can you tell me what they did?
Emeraude: You don’t wanna know
Éowyn: it can’t be that bad
Emeraude: you don’t want to know!
NightShroud: it’s that bad huh?
Emeraude: get back to bed! You need your rest!
NightShroud: Only if you… um… nurse me back to health…
Emeraude: Sure… Nurse Emeraude at your service! Let’s go *takes NightShroud back to his room*
Éowyn: Hmm… Hey Nurse Emeraude! Can you give Fizban a check?
Emeraude: *from the room* yeah sure!
Fizban: yeah!
Emeraude: I’ll do a strip check!
Fizban: AHHHHHH!
Emeraude: *laughs* mwahahaha
Éowyn: *laughs* good one Emeraude
Emeraude: Thanks
Fizban: Are you really going to do it?
Emeraude: Maybe…
Phoenix: *wakes up* ow… My head hurts *look
s at Fizban, smiles and bites his neck*
Fizban: hey watch it!
Phoenix: Blood… must have blood
Lantis: *gets up* hey we’re out of the cage! Where’s Emeraude?
Julie: She’s in the room over there nursing NightShroud back to health Lantis: Oh…
Phoenix: Blood! *Bites Lantis’ neck*
Lantis: AHH! That hurt!
Phoenix: Mwahahaha Blood!
Heero: Umm…
Julie: Oh man she’s snapped
Phoenix: Blood I need blood!
Fizban: Umm
Éowyn: uh
Heero: yeah…
Emeraude: *walks into the room* what’s going on?
Phoenix: Blood! *Runs to Emeraude and bites her neck and doesn’t let go*
Emeraude: AH! OW! AH! Let go! *Whacks Phoenix into a wall*
Phoenix: *continues to hold on*
Emeraude: Get her off! She’s vicious help!!
Heero: ISU! *Runs to Emeraude and grabs Phoenix*
Phoenix: *won’t let go*
Emeraude: AHH! Get her off!!
Heero: *pulls Phoenix off*
Phoenix: Yum… Blood
Emeraude: EEK! I’m bleeding! *Wipes the blood from her neck* she’s got sharp teeth…
Éowyn: Phoenix! What’s up with you?
Julie: *covers her neck* don’t touch me!
Emeraude: I’m going to help NightShroud *runs into the room*
Tinwe: Whoa dude…
Fizban: HUZZAH! *Tackles Tinwe*
Tinwe: *picks up a pole and whacks Fizban with it* take that!
Fizban: Ow… that smarts
Phoenix: Blood! Blood! *Goes up to Fizban* blood
Fizban: AAHH! *Runs away*
Phoenix: Bloooddd! *Runs after Fizban*
Dark Jester: Yeah… Right… Weirdo
Heero: Crazy
Éowyn: Definitely
Heero: CIPGL *snickers*
Dark Jester: CIPGL?
Éowyn: Who knows, he only says one word at a time so he combined what he wanted to say… but… I don’t know what he said
Phoenix: Come back precious blood… I want to drink you! *Continues to chase after Fizban*
Phoenix: *looks over at Lance* hmmm blood
Éowyn: You can’t go around sucking unconscious peoples blood!
Phoenix: BLOOD!
Julie: Yes, he has blood… but you can’t have it *picks up Lance and throws him out the window, through the tunnel and back up to the surface, where he lands on top of Ranma* Hah! Now you can’t have him
Phoenix: Grrr… *attacks Julie*
Julie: Owch, damnit!
Emeraude: *from the room* what the hell is she still at it?
Éowyn: Yes! *Runs into the room with Emeraude and NightShroud* Sooo what are you guys up to?
Emeraude: nothing that concerns you
Éowyn: Everything concerns me, for I am the mistress of the underworld, fear me mortals!
Emeraude: Oh God *sweat drop*
NightShroud: Is she okay?
Emeraude: Yeah she’s fine; let’s get back to tending your wounds
Éowyn: Oooh playing doctor… can I help?
Emeraude and NightShroud: No! That’s okay
Éowyn: Aw, you guys are no fun
Emeraude: Go bug the people outside
Éowyn: Maybe I will! Hmph! *Walks out of the room, but steps on her shoelace and hits her head on the door frame* owchie
Emeraude: *kicks her out* stupid kid *shuts the door*
NightShroud: hey Emeraude? How old are you?
Emeraude: 16
NightShroud: Oh alright, that works
Emeraude: What works?
NightShroud: … Nothing…
Emeraude: Riiight…

Onward! To Part 2!